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PICSPAM: 5x02 Not Cancer

5x02 - NOT CANCER
Writers: David Shore & Lawrence Kaplow
Director: David Straiton
Original Airdate: Sept. 23, 2008



An organ donor's organs are responsible for the deaths of several patients, and the team work to save the last two recipients. Meanwhile, House hires a private detective to keep tabs on Wilson.

I. You're still gonna say no, aren't you?


[House enters Cuddy's office]


House: Cancer, but not cancer.


[He pauses to let Cuddy's confusion settle in]


House: Doesn't make any sense, unless...


[He hands the CT scan to Cuddy]


House: Brain, but not brain. Occipital lobe's normal, but her eyes suck. That lobe should be compensating. Since it's not, that tells me that something's in there that shouldn't be in there. Brain, but not brain. Is this another instance of House and Cuddy getting dressed together? So coordinated. And let's just stare at House's back for a minute.


Cuddy: Why are you in my office? SEX!


House: To find the anomaly, I need to chop off the top of her head. But, seriously, SEX!


House: Pretty sure I need your approval for that.


Cuddy: I'm gonna trust your first instinct. LOLZ, I remember reading some comments after the s5 sneak peek that this was another demonstration of Cuddy being a doormat -- and then it turns out to be one of her finer moments.


House: I'm not usually confused when you say things like that.


Cuddy: I'm ordering her cancer treatment to be continued.


[House is all *sadface* while Cuddy pulls out a bill and shows it to him]


Cuddy: Why does it cost $2,300 to fix a coffee machine? I'm thinking of all the fake invoices that would need to be made after intense desk!SEX (or, really, all of our various ALL OVER THE HOSPITAL/MARATHON KINKFEST scenarios)



House: Cancer stem cells are real. They explain everything. They're like embryonic stem cells, they can become whatever they want. Donor had them, the recipients got them.

[Voice-over as medical animation plays, showing things that aren't anywhere near as attractive as House and Cuddy. So let's make our own sequence.]




House: They floated around, they landed on an organ, got bathed in cytomes, and partially differentiated. And the key word there is 'partially'. In the tuba player, they became lung, but not lung. In the tennis player, they became heart, but not heart. Stop me if you've figured out the pattern. They looked as if they belonged, but they weren't doing their jobs. And when they were really needed, boom.


House: Chemo worked because cells are basically tumors. Chemo shrunk them.


[Cuddy's not convinced]


House: You're still gonna say no, aren't you?


Cuddy: You've no proof.


House: [motions] I have the brain scan.


Cuddy: The normal brain scan.


House: This is why I need to take off her head.


Cuddy: To treat, or to prove you're right?


House: To treat.


House: Chemo's not killing anything. It's just hiding the real problem. She's gonna crash. If we wait until she does crash, it might be too late.



Cuddy: [It's not looking good.] So, the next step is, what? I say no, and then you do something to make her crash, so that I'll think you've proven your theory?


House: [innocently] I would never do that.


Cuddy: No, you won't.


[House sexfully stares her down for a few seconds.]


[CUT TO: House walking to the patient's room, only to find two security guards posted at the door. ILU CUDDY ♥]



BONUS: The Rubberband Parallel

Because there wasn't nearly enough House/Cuddy in this episode!

5X02 HOUSE / 3X15 CUDDY


5X02 HOUSE / 3X17 CUDDY

Comments

( 19 comments — Leave a comment )
u_fisch
Nov. 9th, 2008 11:35 pm (UTC)
I just stared at House's back for over ten minutes...

Love the fact that Huddy is color coordinated!
jukebox_grad
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:09 am (UTC)
I managed to hold myself back and not make a SEXYBACK joke! But, seriously, the man is bringing... No, Jenn! NO.

I just edited the entry because I am a forgetful idiot and I had a little bonus thing to add. ;)
pallasdiamond
Nov. 9th, 2008 11:37 pm (UTC)
THEY WERE SO MATCHY. AND I LOVE CUDDY. AND THIS COMMUNTIY IS THE GREATEST. Oh thank you thank you for providing such beautiful picspams!! This episode was ridiculously sparse in our OTP so it's nice to re-live the pretty.
jukebox_grad
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:10 am (UTC)
THE H/C WAS WAY TOO SPARSE, I AGREE. 5x03, too, but it wasn't as bad because a lot of the episode sort of centered AROUND H/C, so it was enough to squee over.

I just edited the entry because I am a forgetful idiot and I had a little bonus thing to add -- precisely because this episode was lacking in H/C.
pallasdiamond
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:14 am (UTC)
You are way, way too kind to us <3
crumpled_up
Nov. 9th, 2008 11:45 pm (UTC)
LOL YES THEY ARE STILL COLOR COORDINATED! BWAHAHAHAHA.

AND I LOL'D AT YOUR VERSION OF THE ANIMATED SEQUENCE OF CELLS HAHAHAHA. OMG. THAT WAS THE MOST EXCELLENT THING EVER.

And that one pic of House where he's telling Cuddy he needs to chop off the patient's head, he totally looks high. ;)
jukebox_grad
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:12 am (UTC)
MY THOUGHT PROCESS WAS: OMG, THEY ARE SO MATCHY... OMG, I LOVE HOUSE'S BACK.

VARIOUS SCENARIOS OF H/C SEXYTIMES > HUMAN HAIRBALL OF SORTS.

It was Tuesday, so he was just wasted! ;)

I just edited the post to contain something extra I had planned -- but forgot before posting the picspam. I fail like that.
crumpled_up
Nov. 10th, 2008 01:22 am (UTC)
HAHAHA YESSS! THAT'S RIGHT. RUBBERBAND PARALLELS! I LOVE WHEN THEY DO THAT. IT'S SO PRETTY. AND CUTE. AND THINKY HAHA. i fail at words today.
pottermanic
Nov. 9th, 2008 11:54 pm (UTC)
LOL. Huddy colour coordination FTW.
I loved the way Cuddy said, "No. You won't." It was so final and House looked pretty stunned. XD
jukebox_grad
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:16 am (UTC)
It's that testing stare... "lemme see if you're serious. DAMN IT."

I just edited the post a few minutes ago, btw, to include a little something extra. I planned it, but my memory fails. Corrected now, though! ;)
pottermanic
Nov. 10th, 2008 02:11 am (UTC)
Oh YAY! I ADORE the rubberband parallel between these two. It's just so brilliant.
cuddyx
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:10 am (UTC)
jukebox_grad
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:19 am (UTC)
Nicely done! This is what we plan on doing eventually... putting together all the stuff that's been both obvious and not-so-obvious throughout the whole show. We've got some caps we've put aside to come back to at a later date -- like with the rubberbands thing in this post. It's been in other episodes, too -- we want to get, like, a Huddy glossary put together, lol. ;D
cuddyx
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:29 am (UTC)
"This is what we plan on doing eventually..."
oh yes!! do it!!! I love your picspams!!!!!!!
agica89
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:22 am (UTC)
Ohhh, how much I LOVE our sexy matchy OTP.

Thank you for the gorgeous picspam!:)
lissie_pissie
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:36 am (UTC)
THEY SHOULD HAVE HOUSE/CUDDY SEQUENCES OF SEX OVER *ALL* BOARING MEDICAL VOICEOVERS, Y/Y?

ILTHIS.
jukebox_grad
Nov. 10th, 2008 12:48 am (UTC)
Y!Y!Y!
wanderlonely
Nov. 10th, 2008 04:51 am (UTC)
Rubberband luuuuuuuuuve!!! ♥
ellixian
Nov. 10th, 2008 05:11 pm (UTC)
I HAVE TO GO TO BED. REMIND ME TO COME BACK TO THIS POST AND FLAIL. BUT OMFG. YOU CAUGHT MORE RUBBERBAND AWESOME. ILU.
( 19 comments — Leave a comment )